How to Get Motivated to Exercise (When You Really Don't)
By Paul Butler · Online Coach & Personal TrainerMotivation is the friend who swears they are definitely coming to the gym tonight, then texts at two minutes to six to say something has come up. Lovely company. Completely unreliable.
So if you are wondering how to get motivated to exercise, here is the honest answer: mostly, you don't. You set things up so you don't need to be. The people who keep going are rarely the most fired up. They have a plan that still works on the days they would rather do anything else.
Why can't I get motivated to exercise?
Because motivation is a feeling, and feelings move with the day you have had. A bad night, a long meeting or a cold, dark evening can each knock it flat. That is normal, not a character flaw. The fix is to stop asking yourself whether you feel like it, and decide in advance what happens either way.
If motivation worked, gyms would not be empty by February.
What the research says about motivation and exercise
A study from 2002 took 248 people and split them into three groups. One group got nothing. The second got a motivational talking-to: information about the health risks of not exercising and how much exercise could help. The third got the same information, plus one extra job: write down exactly when and where they would exercise over the next week.
The motivational information worked, in a sense. People in the second group came away wanting to exercise more. They just didn't actually do it.
"...intentions to engage in exercise but did not bring about a significant increase in subsequent exercise behaviour."
The group that wrote down a specific plan was a different story. The authors describe the effect on how much they exercised as "dramatic", and the plan worked without making anyone feel more motivated at all. It is a small, short study, two weeks with university students, so I would not build a religion on it. It does fit what I have believed for years of coaching: motivation is unreliable, and structure is what gets results on the days it doesn't show up, which is most days.
Swap "I should" for "if this, then that"
The technical name is an implementation intention, which is a grand phrase for a very ordinary idea. You decide in advance: if this happens, then I do that. It takes the decision away from tired, end-of-the-day you and hands it to calm, Sunday-evening you.
| If... | Then... | Why it helps |
|---|---|---|
| It is Monday, Wednesday or Friday at 7am | I put my trainers on before I look at my phone | The time is decided, so there is nothing to negotiate |
| I finish work on Tuesday | I drive straight to the gym, bag already in the car | Going home first is where most sessions die |
| I am too tired for the full session | I do ten minutes and stop if I still want to | A short session keeps the habit alive |
| I miss a session | The next one is the next planned day, not next Monday | One miss stays one miss |
Write yours down. Somewhere you will see it, not in a note on your phone you will never open again.
How long does it take for exercise to become a habit?
Longer than the internet tells you. You may have heard 21 days. In a study that followed nearly a hundred volunteers building a new daily habit, the median time for it to feel automatic was 66 days, and the range ran from 18 days to 254. It was self-reported, and the habits included eating and drinking ones as well as exercise, so treat the number as a rough guide.
The useful part is what Lally and colleagues found about slip-ups: missing a single day did not meaningfully derail the process. So if week three goes sideways, you have not lost anything. You have just had a week three.
Make it smaller than you think
Most plans fail because they are built for the best week of your year, not an average one. Two sessions a week that actually happen will do more for you than five that live only in your head.
On the worst days, the target is just to show up and do something. Ten minutes counts. A walk counts. I have written a whole post on the smallest possible version of your workout, because on a bad day it is the difference between a habit that bends and one that snaps.
Find a reason that is not a feeling
I didn't start properly looking after myself until my daughter was born. She is 19 now. I can't say I woke up motivated every morning after that, because I didn't. What changed was that I had a reason that didn't depend on my mood. Health stopped being about me and started being about being around for her.
A feeling turns up when it likes. A reason is still there at six in the morning in November. Work out yours, and be specific. "Get fit" is not a reason. "Keep up with my kids on holiday" is.
When it isn't really about motivation
Sometimes "I can't get motivated" is low mood wearing a disguise. If you have lost interest in most things, not just exercise, or you have felt flat for more than a couple of weeks, please speak to your GP. Exercise can genuinely help, and I have gone through what the evidence says about exercise and depression, but it works alongside proper support, not instead of it. If you are struggling to cope, Samaritans are on 116 123, any time of day.
And if you are on your fifth fresh start this year, the issue probably isn't motivation at all. There is usually a pattern behind starting over, and it is worth understanding before you try again.
Frequently asked questions
Is it easier to stay motivated if I exercise in the morning?
For a lot of busy people, yes, but not for the reason you might think. Mornings have fewer things that can cancel them. By the evening, work, family and tiredness have all had a go at your plan. If mornings are impossible for you, an evening slot works just as well as long as it is fixed.
How do I get motivated to exercise at home?
Home has no commute, which is both the upside and the problem, because nothing marks the switch from sofa to session. Give it one: same time, same spot, kit already out, and change into your training clothes even if nobody can see you. It sounds daft. It works.
Why have I lost motivation after doing really well?
Because the novelty has worn off, which happens to everyone sooner or later. The early excitement was never going to last. This is exactly the moment the plan has to carry you, so keep the sessions small and regular rather than waiting for the feeling to come back.
Should I exercise even when I really don't feel like it?
Usually, yes, as long as it is the smallest version. Plenty of people find the reluctance is gone five minutes in. The exceptions are being ill, injured or genuinely exhausted. Rest in those cases is a decision, not a failure, and the next session is still in the diary.
DM me STARTING on Instagram @paulbutler.coach and I will send you The Starting Point: five days of the fundamentals, then a four week plan built round your real week. No cost, no catch.
If you want someone checking in so the plan survives the bad weeks, see how online coaching works. Rather just talk it through? Book a free 15-minute call.
This is general information, not medical advice. If low mood is what is stopping you, please speak to your GP. If you are struggling to cope, Samaritans can be reached on 116 123, 24 hours a day.
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The 2002 Milne, Orbell and Sheeran exercise study is linked in the text, as is the 2010 Lally et al. habit formation study in the European Journal of Social Psychology. Images from Pexels (free to use): JÉSHOOTS, cottonbro studio, Polina Tankilevitch.
